I’m not a stage mum.

So why then have I entered my dear little Millie into the Bonds Baby Search?

Even as a girl I’d cringe watching pushy mothers insist their girls were centre front during dance concerts.

Always tall, I was usually up the back so I didn’t block out the view to anyone behind me. Whatever. I was never going to be a prima ballerina or even good enough to have a go auditioning for So You Think You Can Dance. I blame the long legs. But I was just happy to dance.

It seems that once you have a baby all reason, common sense and declarations that you’ll never enter your child in a baby contest flies out the window. In flies pride, envy and the expectation that everybody else agrees that your bub is the cutest there is.

My happy Millie (in her Bonds coverall, no less)

Yep, I think Millie is the cutest bub there is. But she’s mine. I’m biased. I was in love even when I saw her little shadowy face on the ultrasound.

I think she’s beautiful. Why then do I need the assurance that others agree?

Voting opened for the Bonds Baby Search today. I can’t even get on the website to see Millie’s entry. That many mums and dads must be voting for their beautiful baby that the site has crashed. It’s cray cray.

I think it’s the fear of missing out (or FOMO for the young and trendies out there). What if Millie can win? What if she was to get the most votes? What if the judges also think she’s cute? What if it starts a lucrative baby modelling career? I’d never know unless I upload her smiling face to the Bonds site and see. Can’t hurt. She’ll never be this little again.

But I’m a walking contradiction. I wouldn’t pop a bow on her head and stick her in a shopping centre baby comp or buy her tap shoes so I can enter her in pageants. But I was happy to enter this. I have no idea why.

If you manage to get onto the Bonds website and scan past the tempting 40% off offer (gotta hand it to you, Bonds, sales would be booming and social media is abuzz with pleas to ‘vote for my Bonds baby’), you’ll find 59,285 lovely little babies have been entered.

In Millie’s category, female 0-9 months, she is one of 10,743. She is one of 54 Millies. Unless your baby is named Honey Boo Boo, I think you’ll find that ‘original and different’ name you chose for your child is not so original after all.

How the judges will be able to filter through that many adorable chubby faces is beyond me. Some bubs will get through by receiving the most votes. Sadly many baby comps have become more of a popularity contest and success hinges on how many ‘friends’ mum and dad have on Facebook.

But when all is said and done, 59,285 babies have parents who love and adore them enough to think they are the cutest bubbas in the country.

Win or lose, these babies are lucky to have parents who think the world of them.

PS: If I haven’t put you off voting and you agree with Millie’s mummy that Millie’s pretty cute, you can vote for her by clicking here. Thanks!

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